So now what?
She's scheduling surgery.
She's waiting to speak to a plastic surgeon about how surgery will affect her implants.
She's concerned about missing the Summer; says she can't be in the sun during radiation treatments.
She wishes the breast cancer awareness color was blue and wants to know if tickets have been purchased for the Earth, Wind & Fire concert next week.
.. she's not your typical "cancer patient".
But mostly, she's worried (rightfully so) about telling our mom the news; and as you can imagine... I'm not allowed to tell.

"Anything? Did they call?"
"Nope."
(30 minutes pass)
"Ok. So it's breast cancer."
.......0_o.......
what?
..........
My stomach turns. My heart races. I start breathing heavy.

I have breast cancer.
Well... my sister has breast cancer. But isn't it the same thing? She's my sister.

My defense mechanism kicks in and I come up with inappropriate things to say to lighten the all too dreary mood; all I can say is "They say only the good die young; so you're safe, because you've been a bitch"

Then it starts... "Are you going to tell the kids? Have you told J & L? (our brothers) Are you telling mom?" "No! And don't you tell anyone!"

So I called the hubby again. And my mom-in-law; besides, she's my buddy too. We've shared secrets nobody else should know. We've even spent long nights out on the deck chatting, gossiping and... I almost forgot; I'm not supposed to tell anyone about that either.

She needs to get a biopsy done. That's normal right?! I had a lump after having my 3rd daughter; had to have it aspirated and biopsied and it was nothing but a clogged milk duct. This will be the same; except that instead of a milk duct it'll just be a benign cyst or something. No big deal.
G & I texted back and forth. She was with her so she was relaying the little information she could gather... which wasn't much since she wasn't permitted inside the room while the biopsy was being done. Man! It was nerve wrecking reading texts about the whispers, mumbles, clicking and silence that took place behind the closed doors of the biopsy room. I never had long nails, but after this I had nothing but stubs at the end of my fingers.
Finally, she had come out and even sent a pic of her bandaged boob. Word was that the results would come in about 4 days... but CRAP! this was a Holiday weekend; Memorial Day will delay the results.
"Are you going to tell J & L?" "Not yet. Not until we have answers. " Again with not telling anyone... (sigh)

"Don't you tell anyone!"... it started as simple as that. I've heard those words plenty of times before to know that what was going to follow was just going to beg to be shared. She continued... "My mom found a lump in her boob and she's getting it checked today" I had tons of questions; I don't remember now if I asked them or not; and if I did, I don't remember the answers. "I want to call her" I said. "NO!!!! You can't! And don't you tell ANYONE!" UGH!! I hate those words.
I spent a whole 30 seconds (about the amount of time it takes to hang up and then dial a new number) not telling. The hubby picked up and; well... I told. But I ended the conversation with a very stern "Don't You Tell Anyone!"